Sunday, July 13, 2008

10 Things I Thought To Myself While I Was Really Sick In Bed

10. I have to pee...or poop...oh well...I'll just go to the toilet and see what happens.
9. I'm dying...I'm really dying...this is the end....My wife will be a widow at 25...I wonder who will go to my funeral...I wonder what food will be at my funeral...I'm hungry...
8. I'm gonna puke...I don't think I can make it to the trash can quick enough...maybe if I don't move, nothing will happen...maybe if I don't think, nothing will happen...don't think...don't think...I'm still thinking...I'm thinking about not thinking...
7. Are you kidding me? It has to have been at least 20 minutes since I last looked at the clock...
6. I wonder if I'm gonna get bedsores...I saw someone get bedsores in a movie once...that was gross...
5. You would think people would make ceilings more interesting to look at...I wonder if you could mount a TV on that?
4. Locke really can't be dead...I mean, come on!
3. I better not still be sick when the new Batman comes out...if I still am, maybe I could just get out of bed and paint my face white and say I'm the Joker...
2. Man, I keep getting these hot flashes...can men even get that? I thought that was a woman thing...
1. I think I single-handedly keep Kleenex in business...

2 comments:

Stacy said...

lol wow, you sure do think a lot when you are sick in bed!

Amber said...

LOL this cracked me up - and question, why do men always think they're dying when they get sick LOL - hope you're better now!!